Sitting on my bed contemplating life. My thoughts are anxious, full of the many things left incomplete. Every day I wonder if I am treating people right and every night I wonder if I am likeable enough. It was never for me, but was always for them – these people in the world I want to please. The fear of trust, and the constant worrying about little and big events that have the ability to change me haunts my soul. Am I deserving of love? Am I loving enough?

French classes are about to start. This is one of the many things I want to do for myself. But still I am disappointed, because I have yet to get a job.

The multitude of things I have to do is overwhelming.


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