Restlessness and worries are difficult to get rid of. My textbook looks foreign and I cannot find motivation to study. I feel as if I have wasted precious time on nothing, and maybe I have.
This waiting for a reply kills me. I do not know what the other party is thinking or doing and that is what is the most disconcerting of all.
Maybe I should wean myself off this habit, of hearing his voice or getting his text messages everyday. It does me no good to constantly think about issues that do not concern my studies.
I am afraid. Afraid that I haven’t done enough for myself and that I am too distracted. I am afraid of disappointing my parents. I am afraid that my life will not turn out the way I want it to be.